(from Arabic means a whore )
instruction how to become a street prostitute
While researching in the Kurfürstenstrasse, a street prostituties area, I had many incrediable and very interesting epxeriences. I would like to share with you with some of them.
Part 1 STRANGE
Actually I wanted to tell you a story about Alex, a guy I met in the prostitute area in the Kurfürstenstrasse. But last night some stranger things happened that I would like to share with you.
It was super late and dark, muddy and mushy. I was tired and not in the mood. I haven’t been to the Kurfürstenstrasse for a few weeks. This time I just wanted to check out how it was going. I wasn’t excited, I didn’t expect anything, I was just moved by a reflex. Surprisingly there were many women offering their service but no clients. The way between subway station and the abandoned yard where I used to watch people having sex on the street is very short. I walked fast and reached the place – all trees, bushes were cut down. There was a deep emptiness. I felt very vulnerable. This place wasn’t attractive to me anymore. I couldn’t hide and I couldnt watch. After 30 minutes of waiting for nothing, just standing there, watching walking umbrellas and men passing by every 10 minutes I decided to „cruise“ in the area. One of the streets that leads to Kurfürstenstrasse is famous for having transexual prostitutes. That street is very convenient for picking up guys as it is darker than the main street. You can find different corners to hide in for sex if someone would like to do it.
It was drizzling. Front lights of cars blinded my eyes and made all the raindrops visible and beautiful. I like watching falling drops. Once I turned in the side street I discovered a couple – a young boy, blond, athletic, with a slight Berliner accent and a prostitute around 40-50 years old. They were standing almost next to the road hiding behind the clothing donation container. I started watching them. The guy was about to pee before starting sexual intercourse but he couldn’t concentrate as a woman was next to him and she was watching him trying to piss. They talked a lot about the price and about what they are going to do, but the guy still couldn't piss. After 20-30 minutes a sex worker took the money of the guy and wanted to go away, but the guy tried to stop her and they fell down together. She hurt her finger and started bleeding. I didn’t understand what they were talking about. He was a bit drunk and she kept saying some words all over. I ran to them and guy became scared as he thought I might be a pimp. I didn’t pretend but I told him he better go away and forget about his money (it was 20 Euros, a deal for a blow job) because she could call out and get peoples attention. I basically pulled him to the side but he tried to talk to the woman to get his money back. The woman started explaining the whole situation to me as though I would be a judge and I could bring justice into the conversation. The guy said he was sorry and I told her that I will take him away.
Me and the guy walked further. He is half Russian and half Ukrainian, moved to Germany as a child. He comes often to the prostitutes and he was claiming that he knows everyone in that area and that he will fuck this woman and get his money back. All the time he was saying that he felt fucked up about the money and as a man he has to get this money back for sure. Last week he was injured – one guy tried to stab him, he could moved his head away fast enough and he was hit under his eyes. Since then he started carrying a little knife with him. His language, behavior, and gestures were radical, depicting his masculine power. I was listening to him but at one point I suggest to help me by a blow job. He said sure, blow job or a joint can help him to relax. Then I said I could do it for him. He rejected my offer by calling himself as a straight man and that he cannot imagine that and that I shouldn’t try to persuade him. His words only turned me on even more. He started talking about money again and that he would love to stab this woman with his knife now. I told him that he has better shut up and go home. He couldn’t relax and I asked him if it is ok for him if I would give him 20 Euros and get a blow job for it. He didn’t think so much and immediately said yes. I was shocked how this macho, powerful straight man agreed so quickly to the deal. Then he came out that he tried sex with some trans women but never with a man.
I never paid for sex and I still have a problem with it. If we speak about the fetish and just the kick of role play I really like the fact of being paid paying to have sex with someone. It is a game of domination, power, oppression, leading, submissive etc.
But there are some social boundaries that I wouldn't like to go over. This night I said to this guy yes, that I would pay only if he could cum. He promised to do his best, and we walked over to the garage place.
He put a condom on his cock and I started blowing him. Unfortunately, he couldn´t get hard. I got tired and said it won’t work and that I would go. He became very angry and said I should give him a new chance. He put some pornos on his smartphone and was trying to imagine some girls. I was blowing in vain. After about 5 minutes I stood up and said I had to go. He wasn’t happy to hear it and became aggressive putting his hand on the pocket where the knife was. Only in that moment I realized that this young man could be actually dangerous and that my game could have a bad ending. I tried to keep calm and said to him that he shouldn’t threaten me and that I would call the police right now. Then his story of the 20 euros started again, how important for him to get this money back because he was a very proud man. I told him that it is not a big deal and that he should go to sleep and that next day will be everything fine. I took him to the Späti and bought a bottle of beer (I don’t support alcohol and he was slightly drunk but he rejected my offer to buy him a Cola. He would take only a beer). He took his beer, started talking to some guys in front of the Späti. I wished him good luck and good night.
Somehow I felt happy that I didn’t pay money for a blow job in the end. But it was still very strange. 30 min ago this guy was a client and he paid money for sex but in the next 30 minutes he became a prostitute himself. Is it human nature? Is it just the special context of that area? Is it only in Berlin like this? Why do people sell themselves ? Why would people buy each other?
Questions in my mind brought me to another point where people pick up prostitutes – a traffic light and roundabout at the Dennowitzplatz. Many times I saw how girls run on the both sides of the road with headphones there and offer themselves to passing cars. I used to stay a lot next to the traffic light and waiting for a red color because cars would stop then and I could communicate with drivers by giving them a hand sign for a blow job.
This night there weren’t so many cars, it was around 5am. I hated myself that I didn’t have a power to stop and just go home. I was waiting and searching for car drivers that would stop and pick me up. Actually, it is my biggest wish ever that there is one day someone who will stop, pick me up and take me on his drive to happiness and eternal love.
I was wondering if prostitution is freedom or a force. Do the prostitutes empower themselves by this job. I experienced a lot that women were showing their power towards clients, I felt so inspired and proud of those women.
I spent more than one hour standing around. Suddenly one car turned at the traffic light, I missed his turn but ran to another side of the road and gave him a sign of the blow job. He stopped in the middle of the street, put the window down and asked me immediately how much I would pay. I was stunned. He didn’t want to know what I offer but the price I would pay. I said ok, I would pay and came into a car. I felt to shy and didn’t know how to deal with the issue with money again. He looked to pretty. As I found out later on he is Palestinian and he claimed he had a big cock. I said I just have 20 Euros in my wallet. He said it is not that much for a blow job but if I had some cocaine he would agree. I didn’t have any drugs which disappointed him and he wanted to kick me out even though there were cars passing by. I waited till the road was free again and went out.
I was a bit scared of this guy, he was tripping and driving very dangerous his car but it turned me on. I think I am sick and a little psycho. But I need these kinds of adrenalin moments in order to enjoy my sexuality. Instead of going home after this strange encounter I remained at the same traffic light looking for another prince in the car. It was cold and I was annoyed. Crazy Palestinian guy passed by again and stop directly on the pedestrian way and came out for some shopping at the Späti nearby. I don’t know why but I went to his car and talked to him again as I thought that maybe he couldn’t find anyone and so is desperately looking for someone. Unfortunately, he wanted only money and I said OK I would pay. He asked to pay right away, I said only after sex. We kept exchange those sentences all the time – he wanted the payment I wanted first sex. Suddenly he asked if I wanna be his dog, like a role play. I said yes, I would like to but let's just have sex now. He drove forward. As he was driving I opened his trousers and started sucking his dick, it was really big as he promised but he wanted first money and put his cock back into trousers. I got tired of it and said he has to stop and I would go out. I opened the door, said to him „have a nice evening“ and went to the side. He drove away, I walked a little bit to the side of the street and started masturbating there. When I came I cried and felt so exhausted, tired of all those adventures.
After couple of minutes I heard a sound of a car crash.The Palestinian guy ran into another car that was parked, the alarm went off. I didn’t want to see or know anything about this guy and I just went away in the other direction.
It was enough for tonight, I just wanted to go home and sleep. I went to the Yorkstrasse subway station. There were not that many people. The next train was in 12 minutes. I got pissed off. So I started listening to my music and walking back and forth. I noticed on my left a very beautiful guy sitting alone on a bench. I couldn’t believe myself but I got horny again and went to this guy and sat next to him. It is very easy for me to talk to strangers and have conversations with random people. I asked him where he is coming from and if he was going out tonight. He couldn’t reply as he didn’t speak any German or English. Then he replied in Russian that he didn’t understand. I got excited. A 24 year old, skinny, tall boy from Moldova. He was just visiting his friends here. I tried to turn the conversation into a sexual direction and asked him if he was fucking with prostitutes in Berlin. He answered yes, but not tonight. I smiled and said: „then you had to jerk off today“. He smiled beautifully back at me. Our train came and we rode in the same car. I was also asking about the economical and political situation in Moldova. It should be very tough there nowadays as my new friend told me. All the time I was thinking how to turn on this guy tonight. I asked him for a number / Whatsapp or Viber. He called my phone. It was switched off and so I couldn’t save his number. He promised to write me tomorrow on Viber. After a few stops I got another idea on how to make him join me – I suggested to give him a lot of free condoms for his next sexual adventures. He got excited and agreed to accompany me home. Pretty unbelievable. We got off at Rathaus Neukölln and went to my place. It was around 6am. We came upstairs, turned on computer and I suggest to watch some porn to relax. I put some videos online and we were watched together. I got a harder and was wondering if his cock was also hard by now. I touched his trousers and felt his big cock. He didn’t say anything. My heart was beating so fast. I went to the toilet to get some toilet paper for later. Suddenly he stood up and said that he wanted to go home and that his friends are waiting for him there. I asked him to stay and held him next to the computer. He tried to go out but I held the door and said that he can just try my blow job a little bit and if he doesn’t like it he could go home. He said he is not like this and that he has to go home. I didn’t want to push more and let him go. At the door I apologised for my behavior and asked if we could meet next time. He waved and walked downstairs.
Next day as I woke up I still couldn’t believe that this all happened. The last guy seemed so dreamy and unreal. It was like I was like on drugs and couldn’t put myself together that I made it all up. I have kind of maniacal character. It made me scared and I hoped that I could control myself next time.
I am very naive, I don’t know my limits. I look for dangers encounters in order to somehow enjoy this reality.
PART 2 AHMED
PART 3 WAEL
PART 4 Mohammed
PART 5 Yousef
Part 6 STUDENT